Upon examination of the offending marks, she proclaimed them safe
and removable, music to my ears.
So I asked her to identify the marks for me so I would know what
they were and how to gage their normality if they started to increase in size, colour,
or shape.
She responded by saying they are “wisdom marks.”
“What what????!!!”
I looked at her. She was dead serious. She was selling me on the
“wisdom marks”. She was working me on the “new age, age”.
Her intentions were good, granted, but as I looked at this young,
modern, educated doctor, I thought, “Wow. You are being trained to say shit
like this TO ME! You are being told that this is what I need to hear.”
Does this mean that the onset of wisdomy warts and clever,
devious moles brings with it an ability to go back in time and pass Grade 11 Math????????
Me thinkith notith.
So here is what you need to know, doctor. I reached my Holy Shit Trinity years ago and I have grown
with the vernacular of liver spots to age spots to wisdom spots. And just so we understand each other, referring to my
brown tea-stained facial spots as wisdom does nothing to conceal the fact that
I am fine with it, thank you very much.
Liver spots should be my only worry.
ARE we
really that fragile? I don't think so.
I'm not.
Barbara: Weird, huh? I mean, I’d rather they didn’t use euphemisms
at all, but called them, I don’t know, the official Latin term, or something
equally medically official sounding. I’d rather offer a resounding “huh?” than
be pandered to (egotistically-speaking). And with the endless shifts and
changes to the aging skin/body, it’s nice to believe our vocabulary could
actually develop exponentially. Might make up a bit for the wisdom spots ... er, liver spots ... er, lentigos (???).
