Friday, September 24, 2010

Deb and Barb Have A Three-Way

This week we’re going to start a new regular (maybe monthly) feature where we let one of our loyal reader-commenters and friends begin our blog conversation. As Rigel from Winter Light Blog inspired us with her pithy comment about digressions, we’ve asked her to pitch the first ball.

As always, the conversation will continue in the comment-section.

Deb And Barb Have A Three-Way With Rigel

Rigel: Deb, in your post the other day, you mentioned your booties purchase, and you said, "But I digress."

Please do! Yay for digressions and conversational tangents! Of course, I also realize that I will someday be banished to the Siberian gulag for writers who abuse parenthetical asides.

Conversational tangents just make the conversation rich and complex enough that it has its own trigonometry (my favorite subject in math)!

Digressions and tangents are conversational accessorizing. They are the earrings, necklaces, hair barrettes, and purses of conversation. Do you want your conversation to keep its hair out of its face with plain, black bobby pins or with a fabulous peacock feather fascinator?

I'd much rather interact with someone whose conversation is luxuriously draped, intricately embroidered sari silk than someone whose conversation is plain, cream muslin that hangs like a potato sack.
Photo by Rigel
Of course, there are times when conversation must wear its pantyhose, severe black suit, and plain pumps while slicking its hair back into a tight bun (without the cute hair chopsticks!). There are those situations when we must apply that most dreaded word: appropriate. Digressions and tangents would be floppy socks making us trip and fall (rather than cute booties) in cases such as the urgent, efficient patter of a trauma team, a stuffy corporate memo, or testifying on the witness stand!

But, in most circumstances, for me, the conversations that contain the most laughter, the most insight, and the most pleasure are the digressing and tangential ones that are accessorized like belly dancers with veils, bells, and bangles.

Barbara: Rigel, first off, I just love your analogies for “appropriate” conversation vs natural, “embroidered” conversation. As everyone saw in our video post on Wednesday, Deb and I are completely and thoroughly “belly dancer” conversationalists (even without the endless interruptions).

Don’t get me (us) wrong—there are many many days when we get LOADS written, but I don’t think a day goes by that isn’t peppered with a thousand different random tangents that trigger a thousand more, and so on and so on. In fact, “What were we saying?” is our constant go-to lament.

Of course, the comedy of errors really kicks in after “What were we saying?” That’s when we scramble desperately to tangent our way back to point A––because we’re absolutely CERTAIN that point A was of some really urgent, life-changing importance.

But, like you say, Rigel, it turns out that the glory and beauty of these rich discussions is that oodles of gold comes out of our tangents. Feelings not yet realized, experiences not yet shared, fears not yet examined. Sometimes––usually––it doesn’t matter at all that Point A got lost in the shuffle.

Deb: I agree with everything that both you girls say about this. I think tangents are necessary, but they can also hinder a forward motion when ... did I tell you we’re getting a new puppy tomorrow? Cannot wait. We went out to get the little pink leash and the little pink ... there was a gorgeous bulldog there that I wanted to steal he was so cute. My friends bulldog, Julie, used to dive in the pool at his house everytime one of them went off the diving board, but she couldn’t swim so she would just sink like a stone, stand there with her eyes open until someone rescued her ... I took swimming lessons a few years back to up my skills in the hopes that it would get me back in the pool and it did for one summer. Last summer, I went in twice and this summer, just my feet. I don’t know if it’s the pool or the prospect of seeing the sun reflected off of the cellu ... I have this weird tom-tom poundy thing in my left ear and it is really weird and I went online and so many people were talking about it and wondering what it was. My doctor said not to worry but is sending me to an ear, nose and ... throat thing is going around right now and I have to say that I have already fought off two colds since August with the Coldfx. But why? Why do I get so many colds? I am so healthy and I eat well and work out and take vitamins and still my nose starts to get stuffed and I can’t ... smells of Autumn are bliss with people’s fireplaces kicking in and the crisp air begging me to scarf down a caramel covered apple ... Honey Crisp apples?!? What the hell? Soooooooo good and so huge. It’s like an apple and a glass of apple juice in one ... I’ve never really been a juice person though ‘cause ... have I ever mentioned that I NEVER EVER EVER feel thirst? The only time was when I was in labour and it was as if all my thirsts saved up for that one 24-hour period. It was awful ... just like the thought of the boy going back to school. Awful. We have gotten used to him being up in his room since he got back from his summer job, having dinner with us and enjoying his company again and I am already stressing about him heading back in October ... the heavenly month in Ontario where everywhere you look is God’s canvas. I think God called it his colour phase.

Barbara: What were we saying?


  1. A digressionally awesome three-way. Thank you for the chuckles.

  2. This is as sexy as we get, people.

  3. I love it! You are all welcomed into the wonderful religion of Digressionism. There might be an afterlife, but we keep getting sidetracked...

  4. A three way digression! Can things get any better?

  5. A little different but still very nice ladies. Nice 3 way digression. What a good way to start the day.

  6. And just a side-note here that Cruella is the QUEEN queen of digressions (see her blog) and Rayna plays right along.

    Thanks, Lyndsie!

  7. Let me digress, please ... Where can I get my hands on those amazing boots!!

  8. Deb - A new puppy? Really? *squeeeeees with anticipation!!!* Will you properly introduce her to us in a blog post, please?

    *stares at Deb* You have a pool, and you hardly use it at all! *blinks* That's....that's....that's kinda appalling! *blinks* I can't wrap my mind around that! I can't imagine why you wouldn't grab every possible moment to feel the water sliding over your skin and to feel the power of your muscles as you swim. Swimming feels sooooo good! *blinks* As for cellulite, puhleez! You are buff and gorgeous with your tiny dancer self! Whereas I, who am 19 years younger than you, am the lardass of the ages. I make Miss Piggy look like Barbie. Yet, I worked as a lifeguard this summer. Yes, I inflicted the sight of me in a swimsuit on the public. They all survived. And, speaking of survival, funnily enough, noone seemed to have a problem with the size of my behind when I was pulling their drowning behinds out of the water.

    Oh, and speaking of 3-way things, this reminds me of my best friend from college. *get your minds out of the gutters -- I would never!* He got his MFA degree from Ole Miss a few years back. He had a bit of trouble getting his thesis title through committee vetting because it was a triple entendre: Mounting the Butterfly.

    Ack. You linked to my blog. And, there's been a derth of decent, fresh material lately. Starting the new job (yeah!!!) hasn't leant itself to sit-down-and-write time. But, I'm off work today. I guess this means I need to rouse my brain from its beanbag chair and actually sit down at the computer and write and post the couple of entries I've been mentally composing all week. Sooooo, if I need to write today, that gives me a good excuse to once again put off scrubbing out the fridge, right? All right, anyone who's masochistic enough to click on the link to my blog and inflict my rambling on themselves, I'll have some new, meatier stuff up by the end of tonight. But, hey, until then, there is a Muppets video. And, really? Do you ever truly need anything more than the Muppets?

    Speaking of Muppets, which are your favorites? I love, love, love Beaker. Animal is a strong second place. On the Sesame St. side of things, Grover is the man! I've also go no small amount of love going for Gonzo and the Count, too.

    Is it OK to admire fictional characters? I've got bigtime warm fuzzies for Morticia Addams and Abby on NCIS.

    Oh, scrubbing out the fridge, that reminded me -- I'm hungry! Time to fix a bite to eat.

    Oh man, I saw the most wonderful sweet treat online the other day. They were cupcakes that managed to mix chocolate and watermelon. I do believe that would be a religious experience for my taste buds.

    I have some baking and candy making in my near future. Kiddo's turning 12 in early November. He's going to have a dragon themed party. We've found places online to order dragon shaped cookie cutters and chocolate candy molds to make yummy treats for the party.

    Oy! Kiddo. School. Yesterday was parent-teacher conference afternoon at my son's school. He's in a more than little bit of trouble. Grim times for Mr. Stashed Unfinished Work In His Math Class Desk And Has Grades Missing In The Gradebook. Suffice to say, his backback full of homework is quite the albatross hanging from him for the foreseeable future. *sigh*

    *tummy growls* Oh yeah, right. Hungry. Go fix food.

  9. Deb, if you come up with an answer to why you frequently get colds when you eat healthy and should have a good immune system, let me know please. I have a son (Emil) who eats half a dozen citrus fruits a day and still gets nasty colds on a regular basis. And then they hang on for two or three weeks, ColdFX notwithstanding, echinacea extract making no visible difference, and they're seriously intense -- if only snot could be used for something....
    BTW, we caught a bit of an older 22 Minutes the other night and Colin was in a sketch about a scary movie, where he sat in the audience and they just showed his face responding in fear -- it cracked us right up, he's that hilarious we all laughed out loud -- my lord, I hope he's as fun to live with as he is to watch on TV.
    Funny story about the bulldog just standing on the bottom of the pool.
    And Barb I think I saw you in a laundry detergent commercial last night! Not enough of you, of course. Went by too fast. I don't usually say that about commercials but since you were in it ....
    Rigel, your descriptive language is pretty darn impressive!

  10. And speaking of boots -- I like the way those boots LOOK, but oh my hell no, they would drive me crazy with all the lacing. I'm into slip-ons and zippers lately; fingers crossed I don't start wearing sweatpants for convenience one of these days.

  11. Joanne -- Deb got them through the AllSaints online site. Aren't they the BEST! (Katrinka, laces notwithstanding)

    Rigel -- BRAVO!! Well done. (PS, puppy today. that's where Deb is right now...)

    Kat -- yeah, that's me in the commercial. Also in the Cheerios spot that's running now.

  12. Squeeeeee! *does happy puppy dance around room*

    Thank you, Katrinka. *warm, squishy hugs* Thank you for making me smile!

    Oh, and thank you, Barbara. *takes a bow* You wanna know the funny thing? That's actually way, way editted down. The first digressing and tangential comment I had tried to submit yielded up an error message that I had exceded the character limit. So, the flow of weirdness you read above is actually streamlined. My thought process is even more digressing and tangential than blogspot's servers can handle. :)

    I can't decide whether I should be worried or proud.

    Oh, and, anyway, so I was standing at the bathroom mirror pulling my hair back with barrettes (I can't stand having my hair falling into my face/eyes). And, I was thinking about this blog, this post, what I need to write for my blog today, and stuff like that, and inspiration struck. Right upside my head. Smack. Total cartoon sledgehammer. Or, maybe a falling anvil. Anyway, I think I sense a t-shirt in the offing:

    "My train of thought is a carnival ride."

    Thing is, that opens up some unsettling questions. It most certainly isn't the Tunnel of Love these days. *insert disgruntled, bitter, surly, extremely sexually frustrated sounds here* Given that I'm such a moody wench, roller coaster wouldn't be an unreasonable guess. All I ask is that it be a really good one with lots of loops, twirls, and plunges like the Anaconda at King's Dominion in Virginia. On a good day, it would be nice to be the giant Viking ship swing ride or one of those rides with the circle of swings on the ends of cables that fan out from centrifugal force as the ride starts to spin. Those are so nice and relaxing. But, oh dear. I have a sneaking suspicion that my brain may actually be the House of Horrors.

  13. As a long-time practitioner of Digression as Religion, I applaud this (and see my Digressionista, Mari aka: Cruella has already weighed in). I am pretty decent at plugging away ANYWAY, but find in reality, in both writing and (strangely enough) my scientific work, that veering now and again opens new possibilities, and if you can just WORK THOSE IN, then you definitely end up with something richer. So YAY Rigel! And YAY Barb and Deb!

  14. Rigel. No your brain is not the House of Horrors, that would be mine. Even I am too afraid to look too closely into it, and I like horror movies. I agree on the roller coaster bit love the thrill but I bruise easily. The next day I look like I was on the losing end of a prize fight. Don't get me started about fighting. I never liked to do it but I would make an exception for certain people, like the bitch who keeps calling to collect money from someone who hasn't had this phone in over 15 years.
    Deb really a new puppy what kind? Uh oh, training time. Hide the good shoes, and put up the good rugs. Did you get lots of chew toys? Careful not to trip over anything when you walk through the house at night.
    Barb. I forget what I'm talking about all the time. Sometimes in the middle of the sentence. I just sort of drift to another place in time and space. What was the name of that TV show that had that line in it? Oh you are the one in the Cheerios commercial that's great. That reminds me I need to get more cereal when I go to the store.

    Uh.... what was this post about again????


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