On Friday’s blog-post, Souzan added a comment
that was so apropos to the topic at hand and to the season in general that we
thought we’d post it here in case you missed it. This is a treat!
Souzan: Last year I had a really difficult time for a number
of reasons, not least of which was a traumatic 'break-up' with my best friend.
The 'break-up' happened late summer, and Christmas was really difficult as it
was the first milestone that I no longer had my best friend. I was setting up
my Christmas tree, and one of the types of ornaments I have are those generic
thin aluminum Christmas balls. To make them more special I created what I call
"quote balls" where I wrote quotes from my friends on different ones.
I love it—seeing all those inside jokes and testaments to my friendships (which
are very dear to me) honestly fill me with love. Except for the ones of my ex-friend.
Those filled me with rage. Before I knew it, I had taken the ex balls and was
throwing them with all my might, shouting curses as they shattered.
It. Was. Awesome.
A key note is that I flung those things into the bathtub—because sure I was emotionally volatile, but I was also responsible for cleaning it up. When I was done, I simply took the vacuum to the bathroom, hoovered the tub, and went back to my day like I was not an emotionally deranged and unhinged human being.
Breaking those things was an incredible release. The cleanup was a breeze, and it cost about a dollar and sixty cents. There you have it: the Christmas Ball Method.
Yes it sounds ridiculous and overdramatic, but honestly, the release it gave me was real, and my anger had a safe channel to express itself through, without causing any real damage or hurting any real things.
Barbara: I love this for so many reasons, Souzan. Not the
least of which is that a break-up with a friend is often no less traumatic and
emotional than one with a lover/spouse. I’ve often thought we should blog about
that here (and we will—but we’ll save that for another day). I also love this
because of the happy symbolism of the ornamental keepsakes. What a lovely way
to honour friendships and memories on the Christmas tree! Reminds me of our
beautiful “blog-wish” Christmas tree and wreath (coming back soon to a blog
near you!). But I also love the sheer audacity of the purge. I mean, those ornaments
do shatter awfully dramatically and easily, don’t they? What a fun, cheap,
impulsive way to get rid of toxic memory baggage to help us move on. Thanks,
Souzan!
Deb: Souzan, this is brilliant. Can I throw breakable
ornaments into the car windows of crazy drivers????.... okay, so I am waayyyy
off topic.
I love this, Souzan, because you didn’t take it in to your
guts. You got it out. You smashed the hurt, literally and figuratively, without
hurting anyone. You cleansed yourself. We are so about the trying to calmly
work things out in our modern civilized world and denying the fact that
sometimes you just need to let it out. You found a great way. Plus, being the
tidy house gal I am ... loved the economy and easy cleanup!!! If it were in a House Beautiful magazine it might say
something like, “When you are smashing decorations in anger and hurt because
you’ve had a fight with a friend, do it in the tub. Easy to see, easier to clean
up!!!”