To Snap Or Not To Snap

Barbara: I do love a good photo. And I do love the idea of having photos to commemorate certain moments in time. How much I actually look at them is up for debate, but I know they are there. And certainly with a tool like iphoto, I can scroll past them quickly, if not exactly linger on them for long nostalgic hours.

But here’s the thing: doesn’t photo-taking completely muck-up the actual thing you’re trying to capture???

Last night, my daughter came home for her high school commencement ceremony (Why in the fall??? That’s a whole other blog rant.). I was soooo excited to see her, as you can imagine. But we had a very tight schedule between her flight arriving, negotiating traffic, wolfing down dinner and getting to the school. Not to mention that my husband, very sadly, had to miss it as he was out of town for business. So we’re scrambling, the two of us, trying to catch up and trying to get out of here in (almost) equal measure.

My friend advises me: take lots of photos. Good plan: I can share them with those who can't be there! …. And then I forget the good camera.

So I pull out my iphone for the big moment and I snap away. And I miss the WHOLE THING!

I mean, I don’t know what they said when she walked up to receive her diploma, I don’t know if she was smiling, I don’t know if she hugged her teacher or shook his hand. Why? Because I’m angling and aiming and contorting to get the right framing. And what do I have to show for it? Maybe the worst photos in the history of photo-taking, these, my only keepsake mementos of a special night.

Who is that and what is she wearing?

Is it a person or a deus ex machina?

She looks so "angelic"

This probably only applies to those big events in a life, like school plays, graduations, concerts, presentations. You know, those events where you’re obliged to keep to a distance while you snap. But the question is: how much life do you miss while you’re “capturing” moments? And do we ever look at those photos later, taken from a long distance, little specks to remind us of that… thing… whatever it was?

You know what photo I wish I had? A close-up of her after the ceremony in her cute dress and surrounded by her reunited friends. Now that I would gaze at.

Deb: I have wrestled with this for years. I am a major photo-taker. Thousands of them in albums (not even kidding), but I have learned over time to pick my moments. When Luke had his grad four years ago, I sat (camera ready) and watched him walk up as they announced his name. The V.P. called out “Lucas Mochrie.” I sat camera ready as he marched up to the mic and proudly said, “Ahhh, that’s Lucas James Mochrie” with a big playful smile. Everyone laughed. I was SOOOOOO glad that I decided to wait for it, wait for it, wait for it ... because I would not have missed that for the world. The “James” in his name is for both Papas who are named Jim. How easy was that decision??? So we had our memory moment in our hearts, and then I snapped him shaking hands with the principal for our viewing posterity! Right after that snap I put the camera down in time to see him raise the diploma in the air and cheer! Another lovely one. Colin and I also take turns at events so that neither of us misses out. But I have to say, I have chilled over the years. Now I take a photo to commemorate the event, not to conflict with it. For that, I have the flip camera if I really need it. The beauty of that is, just turn it on, point it, and ignore it. So I hear you, Barb. This is a lesson I learned a while back. My family is so used to me taking photos, though, and they do endure the pain. Every once in a while, they will moan and I will snap “NEVER MIND, YOU’LL THANK ME FOR THIS ONE DAY!” They chuckle at this now familiar family joke. So there is a case of the picture snapping becoming the memory!

How To Pose For Candid Photos (and look like a dork in real life)

Barbara: As Charlotte and I spent half an hour the other day trying to nab a shot of us dressed up for kayaking to add to my Birthday Adventures post, we found ourselves bent over in hysterics because pic after pic made us look like, as I said, “drunken serial killers”. We didn’t manage to get a single shot we felt comfortable posting. It occurred to me that maybe since it’s summer and candid shots are being taken aplenty, to share some of the tips and cues we’ve picked up over the years for upping the odds that your pic will turn out nicely. (note to Char and Barb: don’t pose after wine and beer in a stifling hot house wearing life jackets and baseball caps under a glaring light and in self-portrait mode, angling your smart phone blindly toward yourselves. Enough said.)

Warning and proviso: In implementing these poses and tricks––while your photos promise to turn out especially nice––you do risk looking a bit dorky in real life while the pic is being taken. But, hey, you choose: a fleeting moment of dorkiness versus all of eternity…

Trick #1: If the sun is glaring in your eyes, but the photographer has decided this is the best angle for the light (who’s to argue, lighting is everything), simply close your eyes a few seconds before the shot, angle your face up to the sun and let the light hit your closed lids, then have the photographer tell you he/she is ready, look to the camera, and open your eyes. Voila, your vision will be relaxed enough to get you through the shot.

Trick #2: By far the goofiest…but it WORKS. This trick I learned not on a set as you might imagine but from emulating my cousin-in-law as he posed for photos at a wedding. Most people, especially if they are in a jovial and happy mood, will pull their heads back as the camera zooms in and give that “I’m in a jovial and happy mood” expression that, when committed to film (or digital image), makes you look like your face has imploded and sucked your chin with it. To avoid this, pull your shoulders as far back as they comfortably go and angle your chin forward and down. Now try very hard to look relaxed and comfortable as you hold this unnatural pose. When you see the picture, you will THANK YOURSELF!

Sucked in face, yikes!

Shoulders back, chin down and out, look like a dork...

... But photo? Much better!

Trick #3: This for anyone remotely approaching middle age: Smile! If you are anything like me, if you don’t smile even just a little, perhaps hoping for that sultry Jennifer Lopez look (yes, I know she’s approaching middle age, fuck off), you will more than likely look pissed off, morosely unhappy, incredibly tired, or … like a drunken serial killer. 

Me trying to look all sultry and stuff. Don't you want to just throw your arms around me and tell me it's gonna be okay?

If your teeth are an issue, at least aim for a closed-mouth, eye-twinkling grin.

Deb, over to you; I’m sure you have some goodies you can add to this!

Deb: It’s funny but the best pictures I have of myself are when there is joy in my eyes. Sometimes I am looking through reams of headshots to choose one and they all look exactly like the one before and the one after. Exact same pose with the photographer snapping away.

But when I go to choose, it is the easiest thing in the world. I just look for life and warmth and projection in my eyes. Does the picture give you a glimpse into who I am? Then it’s good. So my trick is: smile with your eyes! 


PS We posted a new Deco Tip and Recipe today (Saturday)!!