Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Deb and Barb Have A Three-Way

Deb and Barb Have A Three-Way With Madge

Deb and Barbara first met Madge in our comments section, and we’ve grown to love and admire her for her bold, straight-from-the-hip writing here and on her blog, Madgew-musings. She represents everything cool about owning your age: independence, free-spiritedness, compassion and intelligence.  Madge also has three other blogs: one about her trip to Chinaone about her trip to Japan, and another about her trip to Eastern Europe.


Madge in Japan
I have screamed that headline for years as I was looking for my passion. I have been an office manager in a doctor's office (passionless), run a 5 hospital program that trained fellows in Gastroenterology (even more removed from passion), own and manage real estate (feeds my ability to travel), been a mediator, artist, and now a writer (have written for as long as I can remember). Whew, I am tired of all my careers. But my best one to date is writing and being the marketing director for The Next Family.

Let me back up. A year ago May I turned in a story for a storytelling night at the Spark Off Rose Theater in Santa Monica, California. The title of the night was Children, and I wrote a funny piece about my son moving back to LA with his family of 5. I must admit it was the most fun I had had in a long time. My family and friends were in the audience and it was very well received. At the same time a woman named Brandy was telling her story. We connected and within weeks my story was on her website and I was her marketing director. The last year and a half I have finally found my passion. I have connected with the most amazing women and some men who are all writers in various fields and all over the world. In fact through one of these connections I met this two crazy women Barb and Deb and started following their blog. And follow I did. I comment all the time as I love to show my appreciation for someone else's wit and wisdom, sorrow and excitement. It has been a love fest ever since. Putting my words out there has somehow freed my soul. My ex boyfriend, lover, friend with benefits has not been as keen sometimes as I wrote about us and how it is so up and down. My family has been very supportive and they too have gotten sometimes not the most favorable reviews, but it is all done with love and humor and a real passion to have my truth out. Too long I hid behind the "people pleaser" motif. As I aged that person disappeared and the real Madge emerged––funny, loving, always caring, terrific and sometimes loudmouth with no filters.

Madge and her adorable granddaughter
As the marketing director of The Next Family, I search out writers who I think would fit our demographic as well as our site. It is for alternative families and it proves all families are really similar in their wants and needs, whether it be two moms, two dads, single parents by choice, IVF, adoption, surrogacy in India, or straight urban dwellers. It has taken a passion I have had on and off since I was young (kept diaries and wrote amazing thank you notes) alive and well. And now it is working into a career of sorts. Most writing today is for free and I have no desire to write a book. I write about my life, my loves and my travels. I have a popular blog and also amazing facebook friends. Please take a look and enjoy what you find.

3 more adorable grandkids
I am 62, divorced for over 20 years (that is all in my blogs) and enjoy being a mother to 2 grown sons and their families and a grammie to 4. They all give me great joy. I have an aging parent and thank goodness a sister to commiserate with. I can be funny, irreverent and I always speak my truth. I love my life and have fought very hard for it. Boundaries are my specialty and it took years to learn. I can teach you. I live in Los Angeles as a native. I have lived in the same house since 1972 on a quiet street in the middle of a metropolis. A little Spanish house with a zen garden and low maintenance.  Life is good.

Deb: Madge, this blog made my day! How often do we hear people singing their joy? And although you had to kiss some frog careers, you have found your princely job. You were made for it and it for you.

And I can totally relate to the people pleaser thing. I too have been a people pleasing pepe all my life, and yet with middle age and menopause, not so much anymore. I would never be rude or unkind but at the same time, I will not disparage myself to make the other person feel better. Nor will I (most times) allow someone to be mean to me. Took a long time and I still work on that one. But hurrah to those of us who live our dreams in any way shape or form. You deserve to feel this way about your life, Madge.

We all do.

Barbara: Absolutely, Madge! And thanks for always inspiring us to do the same.

You’d think as an actor—someone fully engaged in an “alternate” non-office-based life––I would never question what I’m doing or why. Guess what? Not so lucky. I have gone through many heart-thumping, hair-pulling, unabashed wailing sessions as I tried to figure out which path to take at any given point. But it was thanks to this process (an utterly painful and embarrassing one) that I rediscovered my passion for writing. There’s nothing like gnashing your teeth and wailing despondently to make you realize you need to … get a life. 

Thanks, Madge, for sharing your wonderful journey with us!


  1. Thank you with all my heart for having a three way. I love you two and am so happy we have found each other. It really is a love fest. Now thinking about three ways.......

  2. We love you too, Madge! And are thrilled and honoured to 3-way with you :)

  3. Well done..Bravo times 3!

  4. Nice 3 Way Ladies. Love it.Madgew I love that you love your job that way. I just started another job as well actually it was last Thur,and I have to say I love it. So I know what you mean about loving your job. Love the Post today.

  5. Well lookie here - three of my favorite girls all on one page!
    I can attest to Madge's zest for life. My favorite thing about her is that she does whatever she damn well pleases when ever she damn well pleases. That concept had never occured to me before!

    Madge has a true generosity of spirit and joie de vivre.

    I can also attest to her irreverence and..ahem...lack of filters, but that's Madge, bless her heart!

    Love you girls!

  6. Thanks Hollye. Okay so I made faces at the trial and was reprimanded by the judge. I truly thought he was flirting and not grimacing. I used to be totally a pleaser and now at 62 I can do whatever I damn well please. Haven't lost any friends that I know of :)

  7. Madge you certainly haven't lost us! xo

  8. Madge! I went looking around on that site, and it is very cool beans! No wonder you have found your passion there! *bookmarks*

    I am in awe of anyone (like you) who lives so unapologetically herself, unedited and ballsy and take-me-or-leave-me true to herself. Heck, I am in awe of anyone who has even figured herself out. Having been raised to be a good Christian Southern girl and having a perfectionistic streak a mile wide, I hereby do a Wayne's World we're-not-worthy bow before your bold, wise self!

  9. Rigel, I will tutor you. I am 62 and it took awhile but it works so much better to be authentic.

  10. Thanks Lyndsie for your comments. I love that you love your new job. Also, I love the spelling of you name.

  11. I am s l o w l y finding the time to read all these amazing blogs by my facebook friends. Madge, I love your spunk and your "lack of filters"!!!!! At 55, I am still finding my way, but women like you inspire me and help give me the "kahoni's" to move forward. Thank you!!!

  12. Thanks Madgew my Great Grandmother gave my name to me and she is no longer with us. So my first and middle name Nicole is very important to me. Thanks


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