Wednesday, January 26, 2011

In Praise Of Bald Men

Deb: I was aghast at headlines in England surrounding the marriage of Wills and Kate. Headlines like “Hair to the Throne?” mystify me. The concept––if you haven’t seen it yourself––is that William, he of the hottie persuasion, is losing said hotness as his hair disappears. The prevailing thought from more than a few morons is that he had to leap into marriage with Kate before the he lost the few full follicles he had left. There are some who feel that as his hair goes, so does his last shred of attractiveness. Conversely, does that mean that every man with a full head of hair is attractive? Ahhhhhh––NO.

Never mind how this undermines William himself, it also shows Kate in such a shallow light the mind boggles. Add to that the fact that she would have to be a notch above simple to have not sensed that this was coming.

This is a real button for me for obvious reasons. I myself have a husband who is bald. Not losing his hair, not thinning out––bald. He has been bald so long that it kinda surprises me to see him in our wedding picture with hair. I guess because I never see his damn hair. I am looking into his warm eyes and his beautiful face. And when he walks into the room I see my handsome sexy husband.

My Dad is bald and I guess when I was growing up, I saw a handsome man whom I adored. Never saw bald. Saw my sweet attractive Dad.

I guess what galls me is that baldness is always the brunt of jokes. From TV, film, dating dissing, all you need to say is “he’s bald” and conjured up is the quintessential loser, the person you would be loathe to date.

Why is bald the line in the sand? People with bad rugs even rank above the bald. ‘Cause hey, they’re doing something about it. They’ve fixed the bald. And yet most of the rugs are so bad, so hideous, so embarrassing that you have to marvel at this “fix” they have chosen. Look around at the sexy, wonderful bald men. Patrick Stewart, Sean Connery, Samuel Jackson, Bruce Willis, Michael Chiklis, LL.Cool J, Michael Jordan, Vin Diesel, Andre Aggassi and the list goes on. Do they get away with it because they are famous? Is that their “Get out of Hair Free” card?

In our politically-correct world we can’t make fun of anything anymore. Except apparently––BALD. Yep. No worries. Keep those jokes coming. He’s bald, for Godssake. It’s okay to make him feel like a troll living under a bridge. Deserves it. He’s bald.

Our son is 20 and he has gorgeous thick curly hair. He might lose it one day. Probably will. But he is handsome and kind and attractive and witty and funny and talented and smart. And his girlfriend would probably add sexy. None of that will fall out with his hair. But maybe it’s just easier for people to reduce all those adjectives to “ he’s the bald guy”.

Barbara: I can see how this might be something of a sore point (she says shiftily). If people start dissing something that you think is glorious, it does kinda boggle the mind. I hadn’t heard the Wills scandal. I think he is a very good-looking kid, hair in or out. But then I also think your husband is incredibly handsome, and so too the very excellent list of bald beauties you’ve compiled here. It’s poooooossssssible that I might have said “hair” over “bald” (again, shifty), but you have opened my eyes, Deb, to the blanket-statementness of that. And also made me recognize that my own husband probably doesn’t have quite the head of hair he once had and yet I never ever ever think about that. Only, like you, see the gorgeous sexiness.

22 comments:

  1. We have quite a few men and WOMEN in my family that are bald or have really thin hair. My self I have really long thick brownish,red hair but mying could easily thin out one day as I am sure it will. Really, I think people put way to much attention on the way other people's hair looks. I mean what does it matter if your bald or not? If you think about hair is only there to give us looks. That's all. It dosen't define who are as a person at all. Like you said Deb once are hair is gone or going away you still have you as a person and whats inside.That's the most important thing.

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  2. Here here Lyndsie and Madge! Or is it Hear Hear! Does anyone know the answer to that?

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  3. I'm DEFINITELY going bald, mom, but it's OK. This blog instilled much needed confidence in me. Also, I had a good chuckle at the "his girlfriend would probably ass sexy" line, and I don't really know why...

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  4. Hello my darling Luke! I am glad that this blog helped you! And I could be wrong but I think you meant to say "his girlfriend would probably ADD sexy" instead of ASS sexy but what do I know? I am your mother. Not for me to say!!!!! Love you.xo Okay and I am totally taking advantage of the fact that you added a comment to ask-did you get my message about sheila's Mom? Did you facebook mackie?
    xoxoxoxoxoxo

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  5. I was wondering if I can get one of those "Get out of hair free" cards - actually 2 of those -
    The hair my Hubby is losing doubles as a blanket for me at night - and mine is slowly blowing in the wind to other venues.
    I think my husband is beautiful no matter what but I'm going to start wearing hats - just wanna keep what I still have! Thanks for the fun post! Linda

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  6. Linda hats work! I use them on bad hair days. I realize through writing this post and reading the comments that all of us, thick hair or not, balding or bald-we all focus too much on our darn hair. Your husband's nighttime shedding reminds me of Charlie Brown's Christmas tree.:-)

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  7. Another thing I forgot to add in my post. What makes me wounder is: We put so much attention on whos bald or who has thin hair or who has thick hair. I hear people all the time makeing fun of other people about how there hair looks. Why just hair. Why just hair that people fun of? Why not make jokes about tall people or skinny people,or even smart people. What makes people that are bald different from everyone else? Nothing. So why not include all types of people in the jokes instead of just people with no hair.

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  8. Hmmm...I never thought about hair one way or the other..even when I was younger. I just longed for a loving, good natured, supportive man who could warm my ice cold feet at night and love me with or without mascara.
    A good head of hair probably means more to a man than it does to us. We are looking for the guy INSIDE...and not so much whats happening outside....and anyway..lets be honest..Its mostly attitude..Yul Brenner was barely 5'7" and bald...but he still caused a few hearts to flutter..and Sean Connery....well....the pic says it all....HOT HOT HOT!!!

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  9. Hey, I'm not going bald!...My forehead is just getting taller!

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  10. You see that guy up there (points upward), I love him.

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  11. My ex-boyfriend is 21 and has a receding hairline (and thinning hair on the top) that he was utterly devastated about. I'm the kind of girl who has "shave my head" on my bucket list (no, really) so I didn't really GET why he was so obsessed with it. But maybe I just failed to realize how much other people notice bald heads.. Hmm.

    My dad has been bald for as long as I can remember, and hanging in my parents' closet is a little thing my Oma made that says "God only made a few perfect heads.. the rest he covered with hair." Maybe bald guys should ban together and make that their motto. ;]

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  12. You're right Lyndsie, or why don't we just stop making fun of everyone? Melody you're right. Attitude baby attitude! Pongobaz-and a beautiful forehead it is! Kassy-I just read that motto to my husband. Yeah! Love it.

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  13. I couldn't find a video of Christine Lavin singing the song herself, but here's someone who's playing over Lavin's voice; I love love love this song and so will you.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MuR2IELrF30

    You've surely heard it before, but it's worth hearing again ... every time!

    Hear, hear!

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  14. I totally agree that Wills is still a cutie--looks enough like his mum to have saved him, as his dad is no prize to look at. The best looking guy in my high school class went bald by about 25 and that is when I learned that if you embrace it, it is very hot indeed. I really like a hairless head (though I find a combover fairly unattractive... better to just work with it)

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  15. I totally agree with Melody. I love a good man's heart. And for me, sexiness has nothing to do with the outside of their head. What is attractive or unattractive has so much to do with our culture and fashion industry. And yes, look at Sean and Yul - wow. Good blog ladies. I always enjoy even if I don't have the time to comment.

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  16. Kate I love that song and I have NEVER heard it before! Thanks. Hart yes, the dreaded combover.Yikes! Thanks Cheryl we are glad you enjoy us and yes it's all about the heart. All about the heart. xo

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  17. Deb, first let me say how much I enjoy your blog! Now my husband currently has the opposite issue. He is Armenian and very, shall we say...hirsute. And I adore every furry square inch of him! You also see hairy dudes as the butt of jokes, but all I see when I look at my sweet husband is the most wonderful human being I have ever known. Just like he thinks my wrinkles are adorable and, now that I'm 8 months pregnant with our first baby, my stretch marks and enormous tummy are just about the most beautiful thing he's ever seen (and, bless him, he reminds me every day). It truly is about seeing beyond the surface when you love someone completely. And when my hubby does go bald one day (inevitable given that pretty much all the older men on both sides of his family are) I know I will adore that sweet bald head.

    As for your husband, let me just say that in my (much) younger days I was a Whoser - one of those nutty people who would follow Colin and his fellow Whose Line performers around the country to see them perform. I had the pleasure of meeting you once at a taping of Supertown Challenge if that's any indication of how long ago this was! Colin was always (ALWAYS) so extremely kind and gracious to me and I can't tell you how much that meant to the nerdy kid I was. He was and is a beautiful soul - hair or no hair! I would love one day to tell him how much his warmth, kindness, and patience (you know, after the 20th time I asked for his autograph) was appreciated, but I'm sure he wouldn't have the vaguest idea who I am, so I'll just post it here! :-)

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  18. Oh and I totally forgot about one of my favourite sexy bald men-Pierre Elliott Trudeau!

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  19. Ashley what a lovely note. On behalf of my husband, thank you for those kind words. I will tell Colin to read this. I know it will make him smile. Right now, he's on a plane...always on a plane. Thanks Ashley. Supertown Challenge-WOW many moons ago!

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  20. Deb, you just made my day! :-)

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  21. And just today I was reading this article on how sexy women are going bald because their follicles canot bear the weight of the extensions they use!
    I have thick hair, as does my husband. But my father was bald, and I didn't think he was any less wonderful.

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