My Brain On Christmas

Barbara: This is my brain (or some variation thereof):

This is my brain on Christmas:

I know I blithely claimed a few weeks ago that after all these years of hosting Christmas I was accustomed enough to the whole to-do that I could “do it with my eyes closed”. And, yes, to a real extent this is true. All my lists are catalogued on the computer, shopping lists are at my fingertips, chores designed to flow one into the other. I know the recipes I will make so well, I won’t stress over them. I have a good enough track record hosting that if things go awry, I will let it roll off my back (short of getting sick or hurt—that’s always a bummer. Thinking of you, Lyndsie!!). And still, STILL, I truly feel that kaleidoscope brain coming on. As if my mind wants to go in a million different places—half dreamy sugar-plum wonderland places, half soldier-rigid endless-prism places.

I pride myself on my follow-through. Mostly because I’m pretty good at it. And you wanna know why? Because I do stuff right away. A task comes down the pipeline, a dream demands attention, and I deal with it. Because the truth is, if I don’t deal with it right away, I will forget. Guaranteed. (One of the problems with smart-phones is that I can receive and read an email early in the day but won’t be able to deal with it until later in the day, and so the risk gets upped of me ruining my follow-through track record. Morning email is easy to forget by end of day.)

But this dreamy/manic state I’m in right now undermines my best efforts at effortless control. I’m forgetting to go places, call people back, return emails. It’s not the end of the world. It’s just a bit disorienting. I’m going to rest on my past laurels and decide to let it roll off my back. After all, the holidays will pass, real life will kick back in, and I will slowly ratchet up back to my normal organized self.

For now, I’m going to keep changing the kaleidoscope image and admire its pretty colours. Maybe while I’m eating another chocolate square.

Deb: Dear Barbara,

                 I have really enjoyed reading this post ... who are you again?

                                        Love, Deb xo

The Game Changer

Barbara: You know when you read something and it sticks with you and then you try to quote it back later in conversation and you can’t for the life of you remember what it was? I know we sometimes roll our eyes at people who pluck quotes out of midair and repeat them back verbatim, but I’ve always secretly coveted this trait. Oh, to reference Shakespeare or Sartre or Sontag with perfect recollection. Not for the intellectual kudos, mind you, but for the accuracy. The POINT of what they said.

I was trying to recall a quote for a friend recently and I paraphrased it so badly I may have changed the meaning entirely. And I was so frustrated with myself that I ran up to find the book, flipping maniacally through all the pages, until I found it. The irony was not lost on me that this was AFTER I’D ALREADY QUOTED IT! Still, I needed to see how close I’d gotten. (I was miles off, of course.)

That said, the quote is really so GREAT that I decided to blog it. I would love to know if this idea resonates with you as much as it did with me. I was reading Tony Hsieh’s autobiography, Delivering Happiness––he’s the CEO of Zappos.com––and he talks about all the stuff he learned though years of ups and downs and ups. At one point he makes an analogy between playing poker and running an effective business (aka, living life). He says (and I quote): “I’d realized that whether in poker, in business, or in life, it was easy to get caught up and engrossed in what I was currently doing, and that made it easy to forget that I always had the option to change tables. Psychologically, it’s hard because of all the inertia to overcome.” And here’s the clincher (*caps are mine*): “WITHOUT CONSCIOUS AND DELIBERATE EFFORT, INERTIA ALWAYS WINS.”

Isn’t this true??? I mean, from a very early age, I recognized this. And hated it. Why, if I had so much I wanted to do, felt compelled to do, didn’t I do it? Well, Tony put his finger on it: it’s Inertia’s fault! I’m all, I gotta get out there, conquer the world, and Inertia’s all, Nah, it’s cozy here on the couch with the TV on, fuggedaboudit.

No, kidding aside, I’m a super-hard worker. Pretty much everyone I know is a super-hard worker. There’s ALWAYS more to do than there are hours in the day. I want desperately to get my shit done, to feel a sense of accomplishment. Inertia doesn’t hold me back at all in the “doing” regard. BUT. I like understanding that if I don’t make a deliberate effort against inertia, if I don’t make myself uncomfortable from time to time (and routine, however busy, can also get “comfortable”), then I will get stuck. And that stuckness will echo through every facet of my life.

So, while I capped Tony’s inertia/winning quote, I will also try to remind myself—and any eye-rolling listeners of my fumbled attempts to accurately repeat a quote––that the key is actually in understanding the need to regularly “change tables”.

And how have I changed tables, you might ask. Well, in the last year, certainly blogging and going on Facebook has changed my game significantly.

What’s next? I’ll tell you when I do it :)


Deb: I can certainly quote anything verbatim from a 1960’s Mad Magazine, so there. Take that! 


You can always change tables. How do I love that? And I have the same as you, Barb, Facebook and blogging are huge committments for me. It was very hard to change that table. Writing and developing shows was another table changer but I always looked over at that table and there was never an empty seat and the players were drunk. 


This has soooooooooo resonated with me. I am going to always keep my eyes open for another table, another game. Not blackjack though. I’ve tried it. The other players yell at me.

Um.....Yeah.....So, Anyway.....

Deb: Barb phoned me late this afternoon to remind me that it was my blog-post tonight. I always have an issue on a long weekend––as I am sure you all do––because Tuesday becomes Monday in my mind and the week leaps forward on me. So, long story short, I just got the message now––5:30––and I have to shower and go out to dinner for 6:30 and I will be home too late to write a post. SO ... hmmmnnn. What’s new? How are all you guys? Lovely weather, huh? Wow, do I ever have a big bruise on my foot. Still have the weird pounding in my left ear. Just had a good workout. I am watching Brothers and Sisters while I work out and it gives me twice the weight loss benefits. One, because I am sweating, and two, because I am crying. Only one episode to go though and I will be finished the latest season. Hmmmn, so anyway, how are you guys? What’s new? Had a great turkey sandwich today with mayo and cranberries and stuffing. Heaven. Really. Bliss. Uhhh, errrr, Barb and I had a really frantic workday today, but actually got lots done. It was good. Yeah. It was really good. Yeah. Ummm, Barb loved her sandwich too. I have a wart on my finger. What’s that about? Never before in my life. Maybe I am turning into a witch. That would be okay. Give me something to blog about. My doctor is burning the wart off. Keeps coming back. I think this time she might have gotten it for good. So, hey, great. Right? Fingers crossed. Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh … so I am loving my Zumba classes on Saturday. Fun and great workout…………….

.................................................................................. just got back from my shower. Rushed, but really nice. Hot water and soap. Yeah, that’s what I’m talkin’ bout.

Anywho, it is 6:13 and I gotta go. For realsies. So, yeah, my point of view is meditating today. Shant wake it. Anywhooooooooooooooooooooo...

Barbara: So you feel it, too, Deb? I am so in the same head-space today. Just kinda out of it and wanting naps and drinks on the front porch. And yet, there’s all this … stuff … to do.

Oh! Just found out that we were nominated for a Canadian Blog Award in the Best Personal Blog category … if any of you want to vote for us. But, of course, you don’t have to. But it would be super-awesome if you did. But no worries.

Anyway, because it’s that kind of day and we really need to leave you with some kind of food for thought, we’re going to post what is maybe the funniest thing we’ve ever seen. Truly. Plus you get food for thought from Ricky Gervais. Which is kinda a neat combo. 

PS: Man, those turkey sandwiches were awesome. 

Black Hole

Barbara: A couple of weeks ago, the strangest thing happened to me. Deb and I were chatting and she mentioned that she was working with a colleague of mine. I was delighted and surprised to hear the news and told her as much. Deb stopped––I’ll never forget her expression: one of disbelief mixed with a kind of abject sorrow––and she said, very kindly and gently, “Barb, your mind is like a steel-trap, that’s how I think of you. But I’ve told you this news three times and you’re surprised every time I tell you.”

Oh my god. I mean, really? I was devastated. Not by her words, of course, but by the shocking slap in the face of my own brain’s sudden unreliability!!! Okay, I’m used to having extraneous information maybe come and go, but pertinent, delightful, and interesting news that has a deep connection to my own stuff??? Has my brain become riddled with Black Holes into which the most important parts of my life will inevitably get sucked, leaving only random inconsequential details like when Deb is getting her oil changed, or when my sister’s husband’s mother is going for tea with her girlfriends????!!

Deb:  Barb, even your blondest moment is air-tight and ON IT!  And FYI, I found the tin foil in the fridge this morning ... there by the grace of God go I.

Barbara: Thanks for the vote of confidence, Deb. Gotta say—the tin foil in the fridge did make me feel better.

Oh, and just started reading this book in the hopes it might help me. My good friend, Angie, gave it to me for Christmas, but I, um, kept forgetting to read it….