Monday, May 17, 2010

Black Hole

Barbara: A couple of weeks ago, the strangest thing happened to me. Deb and I were chatting and she mentioned that she was working with a colleague of mine. I was delighted and surprised to hear the news and told her as much. Deb stopped––I’ll never forget her expression: one of disbelief mixed with a kind of abject sorrow––and she said, very kindly and gently, “Barb, your mind is like a steel-trap, that’s how I think of you. But I’ve told you this news three times and you’re surprised every time I tell you.”

Oh my god. I mean, really? I was devastated. Not by her words, of course, but by the shocking slap in the face of my own brain’s sudden unreliability!!! Okay, I’m used to having extraneous information maybe come and go, but pertinent, delightful, and interesting news that has a deep connection to my own stuff??? Has my brain become riddled with Black Holes into which the most important parts of my life will inevitably get sucked, leaving only random inconsequential details like when Deb is getting her oil changed, or when my sister’s husband’s mother is going for tea with her girlfriends????!!

Deb:  Barb, even your blondest moment is air-tight and ON IT!  And FYI, I found the tin foil in the fridge this morning ... there by the grace of God go I.

Barbara: Thanks for the vote of confidence, Deb. Gotta say—the tin foil in the fridge did make me feel better.

Oh, and just started reading this book in the hopes it might help me. My good friend, Angie, gave it to me for Christmas, but I, um, kept forgetting to read it….


  1. You only look 25, Barb, but since you've got kids as old as yours, am I safe to say you might be approaching menopause? Because that's what I blame my absentmindedness (I'm 51) on. Also, I'm an Aquarian -- we're known to be absentminded AND brilliant -- and maybe they go together? Yeah! Anyway, lots of women my age are talking about these memory lapses and telling me it's timely for this phase of female experience. I sure hope so.

  2. Thanks, MK!

    Yeah, I'm kinda thinking it's the ol' peri-menopause encroaching. But I do want to beat the memory-loss, if at all possible. I love my "steel trap"!

  3. Cute post. Sometimes it just seems that life gets so very busy, we don't have room to store every single memory. So they're all competing for our attention!

  4. Hi Joanne,
    Very true. Don't you sometimes wish however that the lame memories would not pop up when you need something important? I can still remember verbatim the words to old grocery store jingles! Can't remember the last time I have really needed the jingles but they loyally stay in my mind! And I read something about the fact that the reason we don't remember names anymore is that we have too many numbers in our heads. That kind of makes sense to me. They claim that numbers trump names as far as our brains are concerned. In the olde days they knew everyone names and formally for that matter, using both or three names for an individual. But, no numbers. Sigh.

  5. Barb,

    that is downright scary. I recommend more cake. And a sharpie to write important things down on your arms. And more cake.

    (I'm having a bad day. This is the best advice and admonishing I can come up with)

  6. Cake! Thanks, Gae, for reminding me! In fact, when it comes right down to it -- what else do we really need to remember except to EAT MORE CAKE!!!

    Deb, that factoid about the numbers -- I never heard that before. Very interesting -- and kinda weird. I mean, why numbers I wonder?!

  7. Deb, that is very interesting indeed. Barb, I am seriously worried about my brain! It scares me sometimes because it's as if I black out or something close!

    Neuroplasticity is an amazing (and new) science. Lee Gerdes wrote an amazing book on it as well. I have to read this one you have recommended! Many thanks.

  8. Memory problems? I blame motherhood. I continue to claim that when I delivered my son, I bled out a significant percentage of my brain cells.

  9. 1/14/2012
    I'm going to surprise Barb by commenting on something from a year and a half ago. Barb, if this is the strangest thing that had ever happened to you up til this point, you needed to get out more. Or talk to your husband. Talking to mine always ended up being the strangest thing. :)

  10. I am just grateful for my friend who has given me this site to follow. My gawd I am not the only one!!!!although common sense dictated I wasn't...this balck hole is the least of what I am dealing with however certainly doens't help :)


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.