Filling The Gaps

Hello all!

We promised updates and here's a beauty! Do you remember that short demo reel that Deb, Barbara and Colin created, along with the amazing skills of Yuri Yakubiw? Well, Westwind Productions has it rolling! 

Here's an excerpt for your viewing pleasure.



If you want to see more, please share share share!

Hope you're all well. xo Deb and Barbara

The Two-Second Day

Deb: This last five days our lives have been full. Twelve-hour, jam-packed, eat on your lap while brushing your teeth full. We are working on a live show. We have known about it for eight months. We were booked for it for eight months. We could not get it together. We talked and talked and talked and talked and ignored and talked and snubbed and said, “Yeah, I know we gotta get to that,” and ignored. 

Finally when it would not be ignored any longer and it presented its unfleshed out self to us, we had to jump on it. We waited until the show loomed. Loomed like a huge comedy shadow cast across the audience. But we kept going with “live on the edge, create on the go, fly by the seat of our pants”. It makes it that much more exciting!!!!  Or at least that’s what we plan to say in interviews. In the end, pretending it didn’t exist did not help shape the show, so ... we started. To work on it, that is.

And then the strangest thing happened. Enthusiasm reared its perky head. Momentum rose to the occasion. We brought in our friend Sandy to collaborate and, lo and behold, a show was born. There is nothing like a deadline. And a dame!

And so here we are. Working crazy hours every day as we strive to put this artistic venture together. We have hired the boy to work for us and he has more than stepped up.

PS to that: I have learned so many things about my computer as a result. The boy would push a button and magical short cuts would appear, and I would say, “How did you do that?” He would patiently tell me and I would covet the information with relish. The fact that I have already forgotten most of it is far from the point. I learned it. It is in there. And when I am less busy I know these learned lessons will present themselves.

But the thing that has blown me away is the length of the days. Most of my days are approximately sixteen hours long. These last five days have been two-seconds long. Literally. One steamboat, two steamboat ... bedtime! Now believe me, I know my way around a busy day!  I have had many a crazy split-second timing day that has had me whirling and twirling. But even when I am kookster busy I still run a civilized day. I get up, have breakfast, read the daily news, chat with my husband, the boy, the girl, work out and carry on.

Hmmm. That’s my new motto. Work out and carry on.

But the stunner is the day itself. Gone! Speed of light gone. Like this can’t be a real day gone. This is not the 24-hour day I have grown up with. This is speed-daying.

Where did the seconds, minutes, hours go? They were just here, for heaven’s sake. Someone bloody well snatched three o’clock from me! Two seconds ago it was 10:45. Swear to God. 10:45. Now it’s 6:10!!!

I am finding, as a result, that I no longer trust the minutes- hours- days. They are here one minute and gone the next. Note to self “Time. Unreliable.”

But the upside, and there always is one, WOW, the sleeps!!!  The dream-filled and dreamless sleeps mash up. Wake up to pee. No worry. Back to sleep before I hit my pillow. I am existing in the totality of the sleep experience. It is wonderful. It’s teen sleep! Newborn sleep! The sleep of those who can be hit on the head with an anvil and not wake up sleep. Refreshed and loving the day. Purpose filled. Ready for more. Sound and fury signifying creativity. We are laughing and tossing out ideas to each other and it is a driving vibe! What a way to spend a day. Any day. Purposefully. Days that are bursting with bursting. A day you can bite into and it squirts in your mouth. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Fuck, it’s midnight!  Gotta go.

Barbara: Well, we’ve only had snatches of conversations these last few days, so I KNOW you’re very busy. I also know about the procrastination, and I know of the busy-ness. But … it’s really nice to touch base here on the blog at least and to get the lowdown! It sounds like so much fun (now!). There’s nothing quite like “being in the groove”. I’m sure the show will be killer. And, everybody, if you’re wondering why I’m not talking about seeing it, well, the one night I could see it, Phil and I are now going away! Details to follow……

PS Here is a link to a radio interview that Deb and Colin did about the show (thanks, Margo!).

And here are links to the shows themselves: 

http://riverrun.ca/  Guelph

http://www.capitolcentre.ca/ColinMochrie.aspx     North Bay

http://www.academytheatre.ca/    Lindsay

http://www.oakvillecentre.ca/Colin%20Mochrie.htm     Oakville

Sunshine Sketches: Sunday February 12th, 8PM on CBC

Deb: Many projects come and go. Some are fun, some are successful, some are a nightmare, and some are special.

Sunshine Sketches Of A Little Town is special.

If you are Canadian, this is a must-see as it is a proud part of our heritage. If you are not, please consider watching as it is great family viewing.  Colin and I have seen a copy and it is delightful, funny, and surprising.

Colin and Deb on set.

Sunshine Sketches was written by Stephen Leacock in 1912. Mr. Leacock  was a humourist and writer of fiction who was born in Hampshire, England in 1869. He came to Canada with his family at the age of six and was educated among other schools at the prestigious Upper Canada College in Toronto and the University of Chicago where he received a doctorate in political science and political economy. He soon became disillusioned with politics (smart lad) and turned to writing, with fiction and humour a specialty. He started out his literary career writing short stories that were published in magazines in Canada and the U.S. and became very popular all over the world. Around 1911 it was said that more people had heard of Stephen Leacock than had heard of Canada. Still true today!!!  :-)

Between 1915 and 1925, he was the most popular humourist in the world.

Groucho Marx and Jack Benny were among his biggest fans. He was a huge influence on them when they were young vaudevillians and fifty years after first reading him they still considered him one of their favourite comic writers.

Sunshine Sketches was shot in the thinly-disguised town of Mariposa, a small town in Ontario that Leacock was all too familiar with. The story is based on fact and fiction or, I should say, fact and embellishment.

This production is a virtual who’s who of Canadian talent, with the great Gordon Pinsent at the helm. We are proud of it and wanted to share. Please consider spending some time with us in this charming little town. 

Barbara: I saw the trailer for this just the other night and it looks fabulous! Beautifully shot and with some great stars (including our dear Deb and Colin). I’m so glad you remembered to remind us, Deb—because TV shows, especially Canadian ones, tend to fall through the cracks. I really want to catch this one!

We couldn’t get the trailer to embed here, but if you go to this link, you can see a really cute (and not too long) making-of doc.

Operatic Argument

Sorry for the delay, dear readers. We got our lines crossed today and forgot who/what was up! So to make up for it, we're taking Jo's prompt and giving you a well-deserved holiday laugh. Enjoy! 

Unleash Your Compassion

Internationally renowned Steven Page headlines evening of Music and Laughter with an All-Canadian Line-up to support Animal Welfare Comedian Colin Mochrie and Actress Debra McGrath Host

 

“Live and Unleashed featuring Steven Page and Friends” to support Ontario SPCA

Lights, camera...woof!  The Ontario SPCA invites animal enthusiasts, music lovers and theatre buffs to spend a night of laughter, music and entertainment at the “Live and Unleashed featuring Steven Page and Friends” onMonday, November 28 at 8:00 p.m. at Roy Thomson Hall.  Tickets are limited and available at www.liveandunleashed.ca.

Hosted by hilarious husband and wife team, comedianColin Mochrie and talented actress/comedian Debra McGrath, the evening will include performances by Canadian funk sensation Planet Earth and award-winning saxophonist Matthew James — all in the name of helping animals and directly supporting the lifesaving work of the Ontario SPCA.

The evening is themed around a young dog named Rocky who is a shining example of the lifesaving work the Ontario SPCA performs every day.  Severely abused, neglected and close to death, Rocky was rescued by Ontario SPCA investigators and captured the hearts of hundreds in the GTA.  Thanks to love, nurturing and medical care, Rocky is now on the road to recovery and has been given a chance for a new life and a home.  And in an inspiring announcement live at the event — Guests will meet Rocky’s new family for the first time! 

“I’m so excited to be participating in this fun yet important event!” says Steven Page.  “As a dog lover and owner (if that’s the right word!), I am grateful for the work of the Ontario SPCA.  Live & Unleashed is going to be a great evening of music and entertainment and guests will truly make a difference supporting all of the animals in need across Ontario.”

Event Listings/Interview Opportunities                         What:             Live and Unleashed featuring Steven Page and Friends Hosted by comedian Colin Mochrie and Debra McGrath             When:            Monday, November 28 at 8:00 p.m. Where:           Roy Thomson Hall                                 Why:              To support lifesaving work of the Ontario SPCA  Who:              Steven Page (Formerly of the Barenaked Ladies) with opening acts PlanetEarth and Matthew James

Deb and Barbara: On a related note: we really want to draw your attention to the Save Stich sitch. Our friend and fellow blogger, Hollye Dexter, has an unbelievable story about how her adopted dog has become tangled in a legal nightmare. Read her story/history here and sign the petition!  If you can, buy the really good stuff on the fundraiser to support Stitch's plight. 

Halloween Treats

In the spirit of Halloween, a little costume change for The Middle Ages (okay, not really for Halloween, but it’s good timing, so humour us!). We’ve decided we’re going to chat with you every weekday from now on (or try to, bear with us). We thought we’d do our 3-times-a-week dialogue as usual, but on Tuesdays and Thursdays, we’ll share something, maybe a funny or interesting photo or story or video. Maybe we’ll feature our (promised but sadly waylaid) deco tips and recipes here and then move them over to their own pages afterward. Maybe we’ll … okay, we’ll see how it goes. Anyway, we’re going to try and rock the 5-day blog-week!

Tomorrow, out of schedule, Barbara will start a conversation (that might have something to do with minor miracles), but we should hit our new stride soon enough.

In the meantime, we wanted to share this awesome news with you: we got featured in this month’s More Magazine, which is a Canadian-based mag aimed at women over 40!! We had no idea they would do this and so it was a completely unexpected and exciting surprise. Here is a photo of the page.

Oh, and PS, for those of you who’ve been asking, here’s a pic of Colin on set.

We can’t do a Halloween post without scaring you a little, so we’ve posted this video that shocked and provoked hysterical laughter courtesy of our friend, Tannis (okay, she didn’t actually produce it herself, but shared it on Facebook. Still, credit where credit is due.). This is the posted preamble: This is a car advertisement from Great Britain. When they finished filming the ad, the film editor noticed something moving along the side of the car, like a ghostly white mist. They found out that a person had been killed a year earlier in that exact same spot. The ad was never put on TV because of the unexplained ghostly phenomenon. Watch the front end of the car as it clears the trees in the middle of the screen and you'll see the white mist crossing in front of the car then following it along the road.....Spooky! Is it a ghost, or is it simply mist? You decide. If you listen closely to the ad, you'll even hear the cameraman whispering in the background about it near the end of the commercial.

Beware, it’s not for the faint of heart (wink, wink).

So now a question: 1) Do you get a kick out of getting scared? In any way?

Making Magic And Believing In It

Barbara: So, yes, we shot our demo pilot on Wednesday and it was wonderful! Cannot even begin to describe the wondrousness of it. We promised you photos and here they are. But I also wanted to expound a bit (a very tiny bit) on the whole “making your dream come true” thing. Man, it takes a lot of work and prep and tenacity and commitment and optimism and courage to do it, but most of all, MOST of all, it takes a village to raise a dream. Without our army of likeminded, dedicated, hard-working, imaginative, and creative dreamers, Deb and I would never ever have had our dream come true. All day, I couldn’t help marveling at this barefaced fact. Deb was marveling too. We would routinely, throughout the day, look at each other in wonder and amazement. We are eternally grateful to all who came aboard our project and helped to realize it.

But there’s also the other side of the whole process: the questioning, the insecurity, the second-guessing, the fatigue. And the next day you wake up and you kinda feel like you’ve been through a tornado: exhilarated and invigorated, but also unable to stop wondering, “What the hell actually happened out there?!” The thing about dreams is that very often they feel like … well, like dreams. Did it really happen? Was it as good as I thought? Is life in any way … different because a miracle just happened?

In my experience, I have never been able to have the glory of the one hand without the anxiety of the other. Have you? Is it possible? Or are we just hardwired to be faithful skeptics?!

Deb: Well, I can only second what Barb said. It was a tiny little miracle this day. Yes, it’s true that when we did the postmortem the next day we were brimming with things we might have done or could have done or might have changed or had regrets about. But the truth, the real truth, is that THIS is the creative process. The fact that we were given this opportunity was the gift. The rest is not even worth the paper to wrap it in. We are proud. Beyond that, we will see. 

Deb and Barb Have A Four-Way (really handsome men might be involved)

Deb and Barb Have a 4-Way With Their Husbands

Colin: When I was approached by Deb and Barb about starting a four-way––and after the original misconception was dealt with––my mind reeled with what I should write about. It is easy to go the “aren’t men and women different” route, or the “why do women always...” tack, or even the “ isn’t that cute, she said whiffy instead of Wi-Fi”, but here’s where I want to go.

Phil, you and I have been extremely lucky with the women that we have pledged our lives to. Women who love and accept us for who we are and have eyes only for us (I’m not counting the time Deb accidentally grabbed your penis, Phil. Have to say, Barb has yet to reciprocate. In fact, she actually slammed her fingers in the car door to stop herself.) (…yup, for full story, click here and scroll down to Barbara's response...)

Here’s the thing: I love being married. Now, being married to Deb probably has a lot to do with it, but still. Since I was a young man, I have always wanted to get married and have a family. You might be surprised to learn that this was not an attractive trait in the dating world in the late 70ʼs early 80ʼs. I kept it suppressed, but it was always there. The only smart thing I did as a young man dating was to follow my instincts in this arena. I trusted that my DNA knew what I wanted. I had been in relationships with women I loved deeply, with women I kinda liked, and with women who apparently had day passes. Yet, no matter the depth of my feeling, I was never close to proposing or even entertaining the thought.

One week with Deb and I knew she was the one. It didn’t hit me like a thunderclap, I didn’t have a Eureka moment, I just knew. Like you know you are breathing. It felt right then and it certainly does now, 22 years later. Marriage was the making of me. I matured. I learned how to pull my weight in a relationship. I learned to cook and to clean (okay, how to “boy” clean. “Girl” clean involves making things sparkle … I mean, come on). I learned about the true meaning of husband and wife. It’s not intense passion every minute of every day, emotional turmoil, suffocating jealousy, wild sex everywhere (though I’m still willing to test that last part). It’s doing the crappy, mundane things in life without question because it helps out your partner or because it just has to be done. It’s sitting together watching So You Think You Can Dance and crying, not just because of the artistry, but also because you understand the passion and dedication needed to make something beautiful. It’s watching a little being you created grow into a person you admire and want to be with because of the right choices you made and in spite of the mistakes. It’s dealing with the tragedies and triumphs of life as a unit, not always saying the right things but always trying. It’s learning about being unselfish, or, at the very least, learning the right time to be selfish.

Sometimes it’s work and sometimes it’s nothing but play. It’s the little moments that surprise you like doing spring cleaning, dirty and sore, glancing at your mate in old clothes, sweating and swearing, and feeling your heart pound so hard you can’t think straight. Marriage never stifled me, or had me feeling trapped, or limited what I could do…. You know, those misconceptions that clueless singles throw out as truths. It freed me.

So thank you, Ms McGrath, for making “I do” the richest, most satisfying sentence I ever uttered. Dinner will be waiting for you when you get home.

Phil: You broke the bro code! Colin, I thought it was implicitly outlined in the code that we must never reveal our true feelings about married life under threat of having our man-cards suspended, or worse, revoked! What have you done, my friend?! What chaos will follow?... An admission that cuddling while watching The Devil Wears Prada for the umpteenth time has its merits? That his and hers mani-pedis are moments to be cherished? That spending hours perfecting a French manicure on your lady is challenging yet strangely enjoyable? That having the place to yourself isn't all that it's cracked up to be if she's not around?

All right, this could get us in deep trouble with the brotherhood, but here goes.

From the earliest age, I always wanted to have a girlfriend. Even before being ruled by raging teenage hormones, I liked the idea of a female in my life for the camaraderie, different insights, and maturity ... my own personal girl if you like. So unlike you, when I met Barbara, I didn't dawdle for a week figuring out that she was the one, I took a well-measured fifteen minutes to decide! Yup, a quarter of an hour is all it took to go from saying, “We should take it slow, keep it casual,” to declaring that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. While quite young at the time, I can assure you that it wasn't related to any kind of "premature" incident that one might succumb to at 18. It was a genuine and deeply committed, damn-the-consequences statement with no taking it back. Good thing she has felt the same way since.

I admit that it took me another 9 years to propose, but it wasn’t due to any sense of apprehension, but rather a belief that we would just progress naturally to marriage with nary a discussion, proposal, or planning; Barb set me straight on that pretty quickly and I stepped up. Luckily she said yes and I am the richer for it.

There are so many qualities I admire about Barbara from her beauty to her amazing empathy for strangers, but it's her knack for making lists that has made me who I am. She's a planner and an organizer and I'm not. She knows how to make lists and stick to an agenda. Her ability to bring things to the forefront and discuss important life issues has given us a beautiful home, two amazing daughters who can speak two languages, swim, dance, paint, ski and play instruments. Without her, my kids would be illiterate, talentless couch potatoes living in an overpriced rental condo.... Actually, without her there would be no kids and all those fine traits would apply to me!

But married life isn't always perfect and we all endure our share of disappointments. Which brings up another point. When Barb met me so long ago in my angst-ridden teens, I was quite the prolific songwriter having penned many tortured ballads about my many failed relationships. She's often asked me over the years for her own song and has been disappointed that none has been written. My answer has always been the same: those songs were unhappy tunes about healing or pleading to save a failed relationship. Since there is nothing broken or in need of healing in our lives the songs are unnecessary and would just ring hollow. Besides, I got the girl this time!

Yup, I like being married to Barb. And waking up everyday and seeing my own personal girl next to me never gets old. 

Okay, that's enough. The damage is done, Colin. The cease and desist orders will be coming shortly asking us to burn our man-cards. But when I see you around the ceremonial bonfire, we'll be in good company with the rest of the happily married real men.

Deb: First of all, I will say after reading both my husband and Phil’s contribution, that we are two lucky women, Barb. But I think the key to our happy marriages lays not only in their love for us or our love for them, but in our mutual love. I know this because I see this in both our marriages all the time. But more than love, I think it is respect that wins the day in a marriage. I will not speak for you, Barb, from this point as you will have your own individual lovely point of view.

But I will speak for Colin and myself and our love.

People often say that it is the little things that break up a marriage and I would tend to agree. But in our case it is the little things that make our marriage soar. I will not sing my own praises here regards our marriage, as this is my love letter to Colin.

My husband does for me. As he spends his day doing all the many things he does, there is never a time where he fails to ask what he can do for me. And I will tell you that he has saved many a stressful day for me in doing so. Besides the fact that he makes me laugh all day long, thus lengthening my already happy life, he constantly reminds me that I am essential, not only in his world, but my own.

Ultimately, it is his love for my Mom and Dad and his Mom and their needs that has made me know what a person of selfless quality he is. He loves my Mom and Dad and cares for them as if he shares their history. And he loves his Mom more and more as he grows older knowing and appreciating the things she has done and sacrificed for him.

That is true love for me. That and his love for the boy.

His love for the boy would take us into an arena that I would not have time for here. As they say ... that’s another story.  

All I know is that whenever he walks in the door, with groceries, with our dogs, home from a trip, or up in the morning, he rises from our bed with my heart in his hand, and I look at him and melt. And he looks at me as if he is seeing me for the first time. To be almost 57 and have your husband look at you like you are 21 and HOT is a feeling that frankly defies description. And the gorgeous part of it is that Cupid’s arrow strikes out of the blue for us, from the bad breath moments to the dressed to the nines. We still get that feeling. Mostly it can happen on any rainy Tuesday morning. And I feel it. With each passing year. More and more and more. God bless him, he loves me, and lordie do I love him.

Annie Lennox has said it for me many a night when I have danced alone in our living room missing him:

Cold is the color of crystal, the snow light

that falls from the heavenly skies.

Catch me and let me dive under

for I want to swim in the pools of your eyes.

I want to be with you

baby oh oh slip me inside of your heart.

And I do. And he does. But the two of us share a feeling and it comes from our mutual favourite film:

You are my lucky star

I saw you from afar

Two lovely eyes at me

They where gleaming

Beaming

I was starstruck

You are my lucky charm

I'm lucky in your arms

You've opened Heaven's portal

Here on earth for this poor mortal

You are my lucky star...

... as I read this to my husband tonight, he came to me and kissed me huge. And I said through piles of tears, “Is it too corny, too much? ... Oh fuck it, I don’t care.”

They say that there is nothing more irresistible than a person who loves you … oh baby.

Barbara: Dear readers, I hope this isn’t all too much for you! I swear, when we asked the guys to 4-way with us, we weren’t expecting THIS!! We thought we’d get something funny, glib, a little cheeky, even subversive. Instead, we’ve been handed a gift so huge, I want to ask every long-term couple to write one letter to each other—just one real love letter.

I get it. Love is the most fraught of our emotions: so easy to fall into, so painful to lose, so beautiful when appreciated, so lonely when unreciprocated, so complicated when you start adding personal disappointments, ambition, needs, illness, ego, ego, EGO!

Here’s the thing surveys on marriages don’t tell you: if you’ve been through the wringer with someone––the good, the bad, the tragic, the ugly, the sublime––and come out of it on the other side, the depth of that love––as each of these stories illustrates so well––is positively epic. It’s not just the chemical connection, the romantic loveliness, the sex (wild or otherwise, Colin), the dinner mate, it’s something deep, relaxed, essential. It takes a loooong, circuitous journey to get to this point. And not everyone is up for it. And not everyone is into it. And certainly both of you have to want it; one can’t want it for both of you.

And after much consideration, I can honestly say that if I had to choose to live with a partner just for the sake of having someone there with whom to weather any and all storms, honestly, I’d rather go it alone. Alone is how I discovered who I really am, is how I found who I was meant to be, is how I learned to grow and bloom and think with clarity. If my partner was just a role-filler living here to get me through tough times or help me raise my kids, then he might as well be a leech sucking up my light and energy.

I’m not with Phil because he props my life up. No. I choose him. I choose him every day. And he chooses me every day. And he knows it, and I know it, and we both love that both of us knows it. Day after day after day.

Phil isn’t just my helpful partner (which he is in spades), he isn’t just my ear, my shoulder, my rock, my love … he lets me be who I need to be. He’s given me room to grow and explore and expand to fill my rightful space. Without all of that, I would certainly be half the woman I am today. With him, am I twice the woman I would otherwise be? Of course not. But I’m eternally grateful that I don’t have to test that theory.

Oh, and his story about telling me within fifteen minutes that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me? I was so smitten, so intoxicated with love, I never heard it. It wasn’t until our teenage daughter bugged him not that long ago for stories of our early relationship that he repeated it out loud. I was floored. Not only was I still waiting for that love song, but those romantic little stories from our past had gone MIA too. He’s not exactly the strong, silent type, but he definitely prefers to show his love for me through gesture, action, and physical affection. And that’s just the way I like it. But, as a lover of words, I’m also taking this blog-post and filing it under: Break Open in Case of Emergency.