Monday, February 20, 2012

Pick Up The Phone!!!

Deb: I love email. Live on the email. It has made my life simpler and I am able to get more things done in a day as a result. Think of how many times we have a huge list of calls to make and no time to do them? Think of how many times we can just dash off an email and make a date, solve a problem, right a wrong.

People often say that technology has interfered with our lives, taken over and removed us from the “each other” of life but where email is concerned I beg to differ. As a result of this faster than light communication tool, I have been able to spend more time doing more things with the people I love.

“Hi Barb. Love to have lunch this month. Here are some possible dates:
Monday the 19th
Wednesday the 21st
Friday the 23
If none of these is good for you, please suggest what might work. Looking forward!
Love, Deb xo”

“Hi Deb,
Would love to get together and:
Wednesday the 21st is great. Say noon at the Queen Mother?
Can’t wait!
Love, Barb xo”

“Hi Barb!
Done.
Love, Deb xoxoxo

Okay so that took all of two minutes AND I was sitting in my housecoat and slippers AND we did not slide down the slippery slope of chatting on the phone about everything we were going to gab about during the impending lunch!

But ... you knew there had to be a but. Sometimes email does not do it! At all. Sometimes in fact it can be misconstrued and misleading. Email has no tone of voice, no soul. So, in order to make sure an email is taken in the right spirit I have gone to great lengths to fill said email with tons of LOL’s and :-) and :-( and (tee-hees) and (har)’s. I have even gone so far as to start the email with the following” “Hi just so you know this note is sincere and although the tone might seem irreverent, I want you to know I am being serious.”

At that point it always occurs to me that it might be time to pick up the damn phone.

I have been hurt and have hurt others by sending emails that were completely misconstrued and after the back and forthing we have had to agree to pick up the phone and straighten out the misunderstanding.

Barb and I had one such incident a few months ago. Barb sent a blog to me that I just did not “get”. Now when I say I did not get it, I don’t mean it wasn’t well written or wasn’t clear for that matter, but my brain was overloaded on that particular day and I just could not find my way through it. I responded with that tone and she sent me an email saying that “she wasn’t quite sure what to do with my response” and I took it to mean she was hurt that I had not gotten it. What she actually meant was, that she was genuinely concerned that her blog made no sense and was thinking it was bad and that she would chuck the post.

As it turns out, she was not upset at all with me. She was upset that she felt she had failed to communicate her ideas. I on the other hand thought I had offended her. She was upset that she thought that I thought that I had offended her (breath) and on it went...

At this point we should have employed the pick up the damn phone!  option. And, actually around 11pm Barb suggested doing just that but we did not as I had a mega-migraine and had to be up at 6am for a flight. So we agreed via email that we both had the best intentions and that we were both looking after each other’s feelings. Having smoothed ruffled feathers we said our “love you’s” and went to our respective beds.

Because Barb and I are great at communicating with one another and never have falling outs, we were fine. But there have been other times with different people when it has not gone as well. There have been times when I was so sure that I had been so clear and yet, my meaning was lost on the recipient. 

I am usually pretty good at knowing when to do the pick up but this one showed me yet again that I must be more diligent in this regard.

I love email. Live on the email. But every once in a while I must give a tip of the hat to Mr. A.G. Bell. He knew what he was talking about.

Barbara: You told this story so well, Deb, I have nary a comment to add. Other than the obvious reiteration that intent is everything. And sometimes it’s easy to convey, and sometimes it’s not. And of course our own insecurities and foibles are going to colour our receptors. And so we end up speaking in “defensive mode” about our own shortcomings instead of really reading what the other is trying to say. And sometimes (as I know you’ve discovered, Deb) all the lols and :) and ;) and ha!s in the world won’t make a damn bit of difference in getting past someone’s defense mechanisms (me and my dastardly fear of not communicating well!!) With a live conversation, verbal tone can at least impart intent. Way easier.

But I won’t give up my 2-minute email—no friggin’ way!!

73 comments:

  1. I also live off of email. I have to really with school and everything, way too many people to try to keep up with otherwise. I try to be careful in my emails to not "yell" (all caps) and to sound polite rather than angry. I never send out harsh emails if I do have a problem with someone; it would only make it worse, so that's when I pick up the phone or meet up in person to solve the problem.
    I am not the best communicator in person(shocking!), so email is often easier for me, it let's me talk to people in a way that I might not be able to do in person.
    Deb, the A.G. Bell thing...hahaha! Loved it! Clever!
    ;)

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  2. I Agree with you both....emails are great.....even chatting for that matter...but You dont get an idea what the other person might think of what youve written sometimes. It happened to me...sometimes you have no friggin Idea how someone might take it ya know....Even if you dont mean anything..I mean they take it seriously....Ive had arguments where I had no idea what was going on...there are also some arguments that I still dont know what went wrong there...and Ive also lost some people in this friggin Electronic-Misunderstanding...Now like you said when you have a relationship where you know...no matter what happens...you can sort it out....or when even the other person is possibly in a good mood while reading it or understanding....it can be fixed...But I also have some people I know who wouldnt misunderstand....And I am very comfortable talking to them via email or Fb (Hi Barb!)...So I think you are right sometimes Mr.Bell's invention comes to our rescue...!!! But I'd never give up not just 2minute email....but also the INTERNET.....Love xoxo :D ;) :) B) (ok these are all the smileys I know "lol")

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  3. Thanks Steph! I think we all struggle but it sounds like you have it together. WELL DONE! (and that was a good yell!
    Shalaka that was a great illustration of what I am talking about. It happens to most of us I think. Man I have so often had to smooth ruffled feathers by phoning and explaining that I was kidding or something similar. I think email should come with a rating "this email is intended for sarcasm". Sense of humour required.

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    1. Yeah..I know !!! But the video calling helps with that..lol I guess its great to call and see the person at the same time without using the phone !!!...I mean if the phone is nowhere in sight :D

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    2. Yeah and it's easier for the long distance thing too. Skype calling is wonderful!

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  4. It's interesting to see how society is slowly being socialized to accept an alternate form of communication.

    For some people, email is the best way to communicate. A friend of mine has an auditory processing problem, so she misses much when talking (voice is such a fleeting thing). However, when you write it in an email, the message is permanent - thus allowing her to process.

    I've mastered the fine art of clarification - did you mean x or y? I do a lot of reflective listening/writing so I don't lose much of the message.

    But yes, there are times when picking up the damn phone is appropriate...

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  5. Jo you are right. There are great ways to clarify. My issue has been that sometimes the first message I have sent has been misunderstood. But that is a good tip for future. Especially when it is someone you normally have no misunderstandings with. And yes, we are being programmed for new ways to communicate aren't we?

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  6. I love writing emails. Especially since I have some kind of phone-phobia. Yeah...that's right. I never ever call someone. And when I have to, I'm trembling like mad, my pulse is racing, and I am about to faint. So I avoid doing it (it sounds so stupid, but it does happen, when I call my friends. I'm always so damn nervous...) most of the time.

    I love to exrpess myself through written words (I'm kind of obsessed with writing :D). I could never tell you all the things I've written down here. I just couldn't do that!

    I like emails, when they are like real letters. I try to communicate with friends, who live far away. I like that I don't have to response immediately (like on the phone - and if I have to write in English, I can always take the time to look up words :D), but that I can think of what to say...and when to say it.

    But you're right. Because there is no real "emotion" in written words, you (or I) interpret how things are meant. Sometimes, I feel that the other person is sad...or making fun of me, or whatever...and it's not always true.
    Sometimes, people do misunderstand me, and I spend hours on apologizing.

    Sadly, most of my friends don't have time for real emails. And that makes me feel unimportant and unwanted. I know it takes more time to answer it...but even if I have to wait a little bit longer, I'm always happy, if I receive an answer (especially when it's the only possibility to stay in contact!).

    But you are right. Sometimes, it is easier to pick up a phone...not for me, though...

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    1. Becki it sounds like you have solved the problem by writing thoughtful and precise emails and if the phone is an issue for you, you are doing all you can to trouble shoot. I know how you feel about the short answer because it often the case for me too. I will write a sweeping epic email full of comments and questions and I will get a one line answer back. But I have had to learn not to take it to heart because I think the person may just be busy and I decide to be grateful that they have responded at all. Hope that helps Becki. I can relate.

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    2. Becki, I am surrounded by people with phone phobias, so to me, that's more the norm. My son won't answer the phone if he doesn't recognize the name on the call display (and the name must display). My husband refuses to answer the phone, and has to work up to dialing the phone. My mom won't talk on the phone unless it is me or my siblings, and when she does, she doesn't talk for long. I have a minor hearing loss, so I avoid the phone when I'm tired, or too distracted.

      So, to help within my own household, having call and name display on the phone is a necessity (helps their anxiety). They also do the bulk of their communications via internet.

      For me, working with the deaf and hard of hearing communities, I tend to rely a lot on text messaging, if we're not face to face. I also carry a pen and paper around, and I'm picking up some American Sign Language (not to be confused with Signed English).

      It's interesting just observing society. People who do not rely on verbal communication (be it phone or face-to-face) are viewed as being "lesser" beings because of it. It's just frustrating to see. The world just needs to open itself to other means of communication.

      I'll get off my soapbox now. :)

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    3. @Deb
      Yes! Oh, I hate that...especially, when you ask a question, and the person just ignores it. Well, thank you!
      I try to be not offended, but it's hard for me, because I don't want to lose my friends, but I don't know what else to do to find out how they are...

      @Jo
      Oh, that's interesting...I can only speak to my family members, too. And I won't answer the phone, if I don't recognize the number.

      You learn the Sign Language? That's pretty amazing. I once wanted to learn it, too. I think it's fascinating.

      I think that it's good and important that through the technical progress, people, who can't talk/hear/see have the possibility to communicate elsewise.

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    4. Jo, you bring up such an interesting point. In fact, I've wanted to write about it ever since I read the review of the book "Quiet" -- that in our massively communicative new world, quiet people are often made to feel less-than. It deserves a bit of a chat, I think...

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    5. @Barb:

      It isn't just quiet people. I stutter when I get nervous, then I feel stupid because I can't get the right words out. It's SO much easier for me to write, and, ironically, I have been told my writing sounds like I'm just having a regular conversation. If only I could be so confident WITH PEOPLE I KNOW (not yelling, just emphasizing :) ). Strangers cause me no problem, probably because I don't care as much HOW I come across.

      Now I'm babbling. Sorry.

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  7. Oh, I know exactly what you mean. I'm always so paranoid about being misunderstood in emails that I spend longer trying to work out what kind of expressive face/word/abbreviation to type on the end of each paragraph or sentence, than I do writing the damn thing. It's hard when they can't hear the tone with which you say these things in your head when you're typing.

    I still generally prefer emailing to phoning, though, and I don't like skype much as I hate being on camera! :D

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    1. So funny Roz. We have skyped with the boy without even thinking about that and I have gotten a glance at myself on camera with workout hair and no make up and thought "hmmm, did we NEED to Skype? But yeah as far as making yourself understood, it's a challenge isn't it?

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    2. Roz i think you can use Skype without a web cam . i took part in a quiz for the unofficial podcast for the English 1970's TV show the goodies by Skype and i don't own a web cam . all you need is a microphone .

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  8. My Grandma just passed away...I don't know how to feel...I'll always love her. And her fight against pain and sickness is finally over.
    She was a wonderful woman.

    RIP

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    1. Oh Becki no. Oh my dear girl I am so very very sorry. Her pain is over but of course that is of little consolation for you right now. YOU WILL always love her and a part of her will always be alive in you. I have no doubt that she was a wonderful woman Becki and you will think of her every day in all you say and do. Right now it will be painful but over time the memories will be happy and comforting. Sending you love, sending you peace. xo

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    2. Oh Becki...sweetie...So very sorry.....
      I agree with Deb ,her pain is over...But she will always be in your heart with you..and She must be a wonderful woman !!! Time will heal your pain.....and soon the memories will comfort you !!! I mean I am sure she would want you to keep her in your smiles and not tears....:) I am sending you loads and loads of Love and Peace and HOPE and a BIG HUG....! xoxo

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    3. Becki, I am so sorry for your loss.

      It will take time, and it will hurt less. You will be able to look back and smile, and not want to break into tears.

      Holly Cole Trio sang it best - Cry (If You Want To):

      Cry if you want
      I wont tell you not to
      I won’t try to cheer you up
      I'll just be here if you want me

      It’s no use in keeping a stiff upper lip
      You can weep you can sleep you can loosen your grip
      You can frown you can drown and go down with the ship
      You cry if you want to

      Don’t ever apologize venting your pain
      It's something to me you don’t need to explain
      I don’t need to know why
      I don’t think it’s insane
      You can cry if you want to

      The windows are closed
      The neighbors aren’t home
      If it’s better with me than to do it alone
      I'll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone
      You can cry if you want

      You can stare at the ceiling and tear at your hair
      Swallow your feelings and stager and swear
      You could show things and throw things and I wouldn’t care
      You can cry if you want to

      I won’t make fun of you
      I won’t tell any one
      I won’t analyze what you do or you should have done
      I won’t advise you to go and have fun
      You can cry if you want to

      Well it’s empty and ugly and terribly sad
      I can’t feel what you feel but I know it feels bad
      I know that it's real and it makes you so mad
      You could cry

      Cry if you want to I won’t tell you not to
      I won’t try and cheer you up
      Ill just be here if you want me to be
      Near you

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    4. Thank you so much, guys! I really appreciate it. You are the best. *hugs*
      I had to time to say good-bye, and I'm already looking back on the wonderful time I could spend with her.
      She has done a lot of things for me, and I always felt loved and welcomed.

      And I think, she is at a very nice place, maybe surrounded by cats, and dogs, and rabbits, because she loved animals (I think my bunny, which died more than 10 years ago will stay with her, too. She loved it. :). She'll meet a lot of people, because she always had a lot of friends. And of course, she'll always know the latest gossip.
      I know she's doing fine, and she doesn't want us to be sad. She was always cheerful, singing and whistling...

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    5. Becki my thoughts and sympathies go to you and your family .

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    6. So sorry to hear this. Sympathys to you and you family. Celebrate her life and connectionwith you in your many happy memories.

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    7. Dearest Becki! I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you and your family. Big huge hugs and lots of LOVE. Sending you wishes, light and love, xoxo Barbara

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    8. Becki, I am so sorry for your loss. I don't know what else to say...I know how difficult it is to lose someone you love so much. Hugs.

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    9. *bear hug*
      I won't even try to say anything.

      May your life be interesting,
      Sarah

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    10. Becki,
      Your grandmother sounded like a wonderful and kind person. May she rest in peace.
      Let people help you when you need it. Don't forget to take care of yourself as well, and find strength in the love of family and in the warm embrace of friends.
      Giant hug,
      Karen

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    11. Thank you again!
      You are so lovely and nice.

      Your words helped me a lot!

      *wants to hug everyone*

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    12. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope your memories will bring you comfort.

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  9. I miss the phone conversations. I love email, of course, as it cuts to the chase but real communication I think is face to face or on the phone. It saddens me when I realize that I haven't talked live to someone and I pick up the phone and do just that. I look forward to it ringing and talking. I am a talker and it just seems so much more satisfying. But for making dates or organizing a party or dinner it is easy to do it by email and save the talking for the event.

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    1. yeah Madge you're right there is nothing like face to face, voice to voice is there? But the email is also a gift isn't it? I love to chat too but I have major voice issues so the phone is a strain on me. FAce to face though, lovely.

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  10. My big pet peeve is when people don't pick up their phones and you know they are available (like my kids) and then I just text them and get an immediate response. Bugs the shit out of me. I want to hear their voices not that beep of a text coming in.

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  11. It can be so hard to convey nuance in email. I love your use of the LOL, etc, Deb. Sometimes that's enough, but I'd be much better off if I practiced the pick up the damn phone rule.

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    1. I know Lisa I know. Me too. But some times I'm too damn busy to pick up the damn phone! And yet...I am trying!

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    2. Deb what happens to me is mom rings me when i am driving , i can;t answer the phone just then , when i ring her back i get a massive maternal freak out over why i couldn't answer the phone , no matter how many times i tell her if i don;t answer it means i am driving !

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    3. Linda, I have the same issue! Mom calls (or texts) and I'm driving so I don't answer/respond right away. And it's always right when I leave the driveway/parking lot, not 2 minutes before...oh well.

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    4. i know what you mean steph . my mom is a worrier though . when i don;t answer the phone she think something bad has happened to me hence the freak out . i love her dearly but sometimes she drives me round the twist !

      today for example mom had chemo and i had some shopping in a near by shopping centre to do so i did it and went home. mom rang me from the hospital to say come and get her (mom never learnt to drive , dad and i do )i told her it would be a few minutes before i was ready to leave the house . she told me to call her when i was leaving which i forgot to do as got ready to go out and ran out of the house and jumped in my car . normally i would give a quick call form a red traffic light . i did'nt get one between here and the hospital (you never get a stop light when you want one !)i rang her from the hospital grounds and got the third degree for not ringing her earlier . i grant though you mom was in pain from her chemo and might have been pissed off in general .

      another thing she does is stays on the phone to me for hours even if i tell her i have to go . i describe my mother as someone who is lacking a shut up button !:-)

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  12. Speaking of phones....I found this amazing video from friends LOL
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-I-xw-Ej70I

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  13. I can't believe how many times I've re-read my OWN e-mails, and thought "DAMN!" if I were the OTHER person, I'd be offended! Sometimes it takes a bit of perspective to see how we create unnecessary upsets ourselves, and sometimes it takes time, honesty and a lot of self-reflection that takes waaaay more time than "picking up the damn phone," to admit that we've overreacted to someone else's communication.
    the whole thing reminds me that when it comes right down to it, whether by e-mail or by phone, our words have power, and so does our delivery. it is our job to figure out our own work in the world, and to think before we speak or type. in addition, it takes a little extra work to remember that e-mail is yet another vehicle for us to slow down, take a breath and decide if we're responding as an action or a REaction. love your posts Barb & Deb--

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    1. Perfectly said Lori. I just copied and pasted it into my brain! Love it!

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    2. ...Oh great Deb could you 'E-mail' me that ? I loved it too LOL

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  14. I think the real subtext of those opening emails is that Deb loves Barb more since she used more x's and o's. But that's just what I read into it. ;)

    I am the type of person who types emails and texts EXACTLY AS I WOULD SAY THEM, aka tons of ALL CAPS (because that's how I talk, sadly), and copious amounts of punctuation so you too can pause and breath as you read it, just as I would if I were actually speaking to you over the phone.

    Unfortunately, NO ONE ELSE in the universe does this but me, so almost every single email I get, I assume the sender is mad at me, because they wrote like a normal person writes. So I see "That's fine. See you later." as being brusque, rude, or angry. And then I have a mental break down, and then I write back, "ARE YOU MAAAAD AT MEEE?!?!"

    ...which...is exactly how I would say it if I actually spoke to that person.

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    1. emmysuh I have to say that I do this to a large degree too. Even in my blog posts I am always with the !!!!!!! and the LOVES and the CAPS and the :-) and yet still I screw up. Keep it up, that's what I say! And yeah I often think the "are you mad at me" and then I try and think why would they be and then I calm down and then I write back, LOVE YOU !!!!!!

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    2. i also write e-mails exactly how i speak though the difference between myself emmysuh and deb is i tend not to use capital letters . owing to my dyslexia if i get a mail written entirely in capitals i can;t read it . it just looks like a jumble of letters . same with mobile phone leet speak . just goes to show how different people are !

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  15. I am for sure an e mail person. I have never understood how girls can get on the phone and talk for hours and hours?? I am just not coomfortable on the phone. Since I have been away at college I have used Skype, but that still is not as comfortable as e mail for me. I am just better at written communication : )

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    1. Kelly I used to talk on the phone for hours. I can still do it (right person right subject) but baby I love the email!

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  16. Sharon (what we have here is a failure to communicate) ReineFebruary 20, 2012 at 6:05 PM

    Still a big phone user esp w my sisters- tho I have learned to text- esp w my nieces/nephew.
    The nuances that are lost in the written form-I usta fantasize they could come up w special fonts that could be hearts and flowers when u were happy and blue and rainy whenu were sad and red w flames when u were mad. Sadly(rain) that has not happened yet tech wise but who knows? some day.

    Til then ..
    One ringy dingy
    Twoe ringy dingys...

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  17. Oh Sharon I love the font idea!!!! You must invent that. Then we can say what we want and disguise it with flowers!!! Ringy dingy for sure!

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  18. it seems like i am the only person here who prefers to use the phone instead of e-mail . i worked in retail for almost 20 years so talking to people face to face or by phone is second nature to me and something people tell me i am good at . misunderstandings can still occur but they are easier to out right . the only problem is i suffer a lot from failure in the tact department !

    when dad and i worked from home i never answered the land line only my mobile phone as 9 out of 10 times a caller would need a word with Dad or Mom so i would let them answer it .

    having said that i know e-mail has it's place, for me it is great to be able to send pictures to my uncle and his friend Todd in new york and to keep in touch with my boyfriend all all my friends who live outside Ireland and read about issues that concern me in my Facebook groups . i am just bad at sitting down and writting them .
    i can get very self conscious about my dyslexic typing , not so much with my friends who are used to me but if i had to write a e-mail for work i always felt pressure to get it right.
    i actually felt the same way when i started posting here too. i did think o my god a lot of these people are professional writers can i keep up without making myself look a prime eejit ? then as i started reading more i just thought oh what the heck and joined in .

    my boyfriend and i text most evenings as he lives in the UK , he knows i am not a great e-mailer . we have had a couple of misunderstandings but considering the amount of texts we send it doesn't happen very often .

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    1. Linda there is nothing wrong with preferring the phone. I think that has been the back and forth of this today. I think we all have a love love hate love hate with email and phone so it is easy to find value in either side. As far as worrying about your contribution, it is stellar and we always look forward to it. when you speak of writers you may be shocked to learn that all of us have challenges one way or another. Thanks.

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  19. Hello everyone!

    I am sometimes thankful for the progress we have made especially at this point in my life with both kids grown and for the most part away from me. (Keep your fingers crossed and maybe Ricky will be home this weekend). If it wasn't for the cell phones and emails, I would not get to "talk" to my kids for days. I love Facebook because through it I have been able to reconnect with family and friends I lost track of. I love hearing about their lives now and how they're doing, especially getting to know their families as well.

    But sometimes I miss the old days, the simpler days when life seemed less hectic and people seemed to have time to just chat on the front porch. Growing up on Long Island, summer days seemed to last forever and everyone knew everyone else in town. It was very Mayberry like in those days, have not been back in years but do not need to see it to know those days are gone.

    Then again if it were not for the newfangled web stuff I would not have found the new friends that live here in Deb and Barb's blog! You never know what treasure you will find out there!

    Mary Stone

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    1. Mary this is exactly how I feel about it. I long for the old days of red rover and street lights and porch chats but OHHHHH what this new fangled machine has connected us to!

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  20. Talking on the phone right now with my best friend!! ^__^

    Ever since we got faster internet at home, I (and vice versa) have been emailing my mom. She's been emailing me and Holly videos and stuff that tickles her fancy. It's just...AWESOME. I look forward to receiving my mommy emails! Another thing is my adviser checks her email ALL THE TIME. I can send an email and within minutes receive a reply. AWESOME. :D

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    1. It is awesome Kelly you are right. And funnily enough this emailing has given me a greater connection to my mother in law whom I love. We went from sporadic phone calling to constant email and pictures. So I know what you mean about mommy emails.

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  21. Like my sis, being a full-time student has me utterly DEPENDENT on e-mail. Since my parents now have faster internet we e-mail all the time and I love it! However, I still cherish our weekly phone calls; I love hearing my parent's voices! :)

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    1. Holly it's true. Nothing will ever replace the voices. I speak to Mom and Dad every day sometimes many times and I cannot imagine not doing that.

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  22. This is a oft-discussed topic with me. Every last one of my family absolutely LOVES gabbing for hours and hours and hours.
    I, however, have a severe hearing loss, and despite the fact that I do wear hearing aids, I am reluctant to converse verbally. Even face to face, it's so difficult to get the gist of what people are saying. I frequently have to resort to reading lips to even attempt to understand what's going on. It's a lot of guesswork.
    Which means, of course, that it's even worse over the phone. With phones you have to deal with static and weirdly amplified background noise and hearing aids when they're trying to switch into phone mode but really they're just making it a million times worse. And you can't read lips.
    Email and texting, while they do have their faults, are godsends for people like me. They also have the added bonus of ensuring that you at least have to think before your words are out there. I don't think there is a single person alive who hasn't had one of those "what the flarp did I just say and where is the nearest brick to smash my head in" moments. Sure, there may be unintentional loss of meaning, but at least there isn't any foot-in-mouth. Well, not much.
    So yeah, I see what all of you guys are getting at here. It's just that there's not always just two sides to any argument.

    May your life be interesting,
    Sarah

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    1. Sarah, email is the way for you! And how lucky are we that this is available to all who thrive on it. Clearly it has opened up your world and hurrah for that i say!

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    2. "What the flarp" Now THAT is a time when I enjoy reading a message, 'cause who'd use that in 'real voice?' LOVE IT.

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  23. Sorry for not responding sooner but I have had so much going on in the last couple of days.
    lOVE the subject of today, I love email i really do. Actually I do email quite often and I have to say that sometimes its more of a pain than anything after you email so much. If I have something i want to send one I would rather just txt them or facebook them. Although talking by phone is good as well.

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  24. Lyndsie no worries, always wonderful to hear from you. And you are like me with the email and phone. You clearly see the merits of both. FB good too. I have made so many connections that way.

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  25. My family really gets annoyed with me because I rarely answer the phone or call them. I prefer email. My family has a tendency to be extra long winded, especially the MEN in my family. They have to spend 10 or more minutes on each topic, telling me how I'm doing "it" wrong, and how to do "it" correctly. UGH. Email is much better for me, and more efficient. So, in defense of "non-phone people" to "phone people"... Just because you call me does not mean I have to stop everything and answer the call. I may be writing, feeding the dog, shaving the old pits, or just being lazy and not really feeling up to a conversation. There was a wonderful invention that was created not long before the mobile phone. It's called VOICE MAIL. "Leave a message at the sound of the tone and I'll get back to you as soon as I am able. BEEEEEEEP" I'm not looking at my caller ID and thinking, "oh crap not YOU again!" I'm probably shoveling in some chips and salsa or talking to my big toe about allowing its nail to become ingrown again. I might be on my inversion table hanging upside down relieving my squashed disks, or signing for a package, or in the middle of my favorite show about vampires/zombies/teenagers. Regardless of my reasons for not answering, leave a message and get over it. I'm not on the other end saying "Ah HA!" and looking in my "Little Book of Diabolical Things To Do To Callers of My Phone", which had to be made bigger just from the length of the title alone. ;) I'm not plotting a scheme, or going over in my head as to why you might be calling me. I'm busy, or sleeping, in which case you should know "Don't poke the BEAR". Trust me, if I'm sleeping you really don't want me answering the phone, if screaming "WTF do YOU WANT" can be called "answering the phone". In any case, after the beep, state your name, briefly mention the reason for calling, say bye, hang up, and get back to what you were doing before thinking it was a good idea to bother...erm...ring me up. I'll get back to you. I will. I promise. Just don't ignore ME when I call YOU just to get even with me for MY not answering earlier. ;)
    Hugs, Karen

    P.S. I worked in IT support for close to 30 yrs, a lot of that time was spent talking on the phone to "mentally challenged" users. I've retired. Not wanna talk on bad phone. Not wanna, not gonna. :)

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  26. BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP..Karen thanks for beautifully representing one side of the argument!

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  27. I was wondering how Barb would take my take on her "Quantum" blog. Was I being too flip? Will she laugh? Will she get what I mean? I was ready to apologize if she was offended. What does bother me the is idea of putting a disclaimer after everything I type saying I meant this, so don't take it as a personal affront to you.

    I often tweet something directed at one of the famous people I follow, then end up deleting it because I don't know how it will be taken. Catch is, I never know if it's even being read, never mind how it's being taken. Do they know I'm being a wise ass or...whatever else I could sound like?

    If I could have everyone's phone number, I could call them and give them the 140-character version of the tweet, but put it in the correct context by the inflections in my voice. Assuming I won't be getting Colin's, John Cena's or RuPaul's number any time soon, another option is to stop tweeting at all. Yeah. I could say I will all I want, but realistically, it won't happen.

    I guess I'll just keep using that Delete button.

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  28. I say put it out there and to hell with the delete. If you are really worried about Barb ask her, but I did not hear her say anything about it so I am sure she was not offended.

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    1. Barb responded and was very happy with what I wrote. I was just so paranoid about it. I hate when writing makes me uncomfortable. Guess I'll get over that one. :) ;)

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  29. Dawn I'm so glad. Not surprised though. We both think the world of you.

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